We've all had them. Me- I've had enough to run a year long marathon on America's Funniest Home Videos-but here is one of my favorites...
It was the summer of 1993 ( I think). A few friends and I decided to go to Pizza Hut for lunch. Now this was back in the day when Pizza Hut had a kick ass buffet and restaurant, not just delivery.
It was the summer of 1993 ( I think). A few friends and I decided to go to Pizza Hut for lunch. Now this was back in the day when Pizza Hut had a kick ass buffet and restaurant, not just delivery.
We ate, talked, had a great time. We get the bill, I put my money on the table and I told my friends I would be right back, I had to pee. Now, if I were to design a restaurant, my choice of placement for a restroom would NOT be smack dab in the front of the restuarant.. obviously I did not design this particualr restaurant (which was just one big room with tables and the bufet in the middle). So I go to the front of restaurant and enter the bathroom. Sink is immediately on my left and toilet is about 6 feet from the sink.
Being as it is 1993, I am dressed in my gnarly mid shirt and shorts. I put my 'just in case I slip and hit the seat' toilet paper on the seat, pull down my shorts and squat. As I begin to do my business, I notice that I neglected to lock the door to this single bathroom. I instantly squeeze and halt all further bodily releases. I inch my way ( carefully so that my shorts, which are at my knees don't hit the floor) towards the door. Now mind you, everything from mid stomach to knees is without cover. I get close enough to the door to reach over to lock it. Just as my fingers touch the knob the door opens -WIDE! I look up to a happy little couple needing to use the bathroom. I shriek (quite loudly). These two poor innocent full bladdered people ( who hopefully already ate) see me squatting over by the door, nowhere near the toilet with my pants down! They looked at me like I was INSANE! Then I look past them...... there we have a restuarant full of people looking up to see what the shreiking it about and I'm there at the door with my pants down....
I slammed the door shut ( again making as much noise as one can possibly make while going to the bathroom) and just stayed in there for about 10 minutes wondering how to make my exit. Finally I decided that I can not stay in Pizza Hut forever , opened the bathroom door and ran out the front door. Then I proceed to knock on the window to let me friends that I was out there and was NOT coming back in.... Humiliating....
Pizza Hut 'restuarants' around here are now closed. GEE I wonder why.........................
Being as it is 1993, I am dressed in my gnarly mid shirt and shorts. I put my 'just in case I slip and hit the seat' toilet paper on the seat, pull down my shorts and squat. As I begin to do my business, I notice that I neglected to lock the door to this single bathroom. I instantly squeeze and halt all further bodily releases. I inch my way ( carefully so that my shorts, which are at my knees don't hit the floor) towards the door. Now mind you, everything from mid stomach to knees is without cover. I get close enough to the door to reach over to lock it. Just as my fingers touch the knob the door opens -WIDE! I look up to a happy little couple needing to use the bathroom. I shriek (quite loudly). These two poor innocent full bladdered people ( who hopefully already ate) see me squatting over by the door, nowhere near the toilet with my pants down! They looked at me like I was INSANE! Then I look past them...... there we have a restuarant full of people looking up to see what the shreiking it about and I'm there at the door with my pants down....
I slammed the door shut ( again making as much noise as one can possibly make while going to the bathroom) and just stayed in there for about 10 minutes wondering how to make my exit. Finally I decided that I can not stay in Pizza Hut forever , opened the bathroom door and ran out the front door. Then I proceed to knock on the window to let me friends that I was out there and was NOT coming back in.... Humiliating....
Pizza Hut 'restuarants' around here are now closed. GEE I wonder why.........................
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