Things I Have Learned

There is an overwhelming number of Americans who do NOT know their own address.

Never trust a driver who waves to you to let you know it's clear to make a turn.

You should ALWAYS lock the door when in a single public bathroom.

Some people feel better just by making you feel bad.

The 'tough' guys are usually the softies.

Facebook is ridiculous yet addicting.

Sometimes you are better off just agreeing to disagree.

Old men are very flirtatious.

Never light a match near a head full of hairspray.

If you smell something burning, trust your instincts.

Some people talk...constantly and just never shut up so deal with it.

If someone's eyes are red every day, they aren't really just tired all the time.

I've been slackin'

I haven't posted in over a month. Mainly due to lightning striking my computer and putting me out of commission. And secondly because at this point it seems that the only one reading this is ME as I type it ;). Moving on.... You never realize how much you rely on things until you don't have them at your disposal.

Naturally, as soon as I heard the ridiculous crash of lightning and realized that my computer was down,, I needed it IMMEDIATELY to pay bills, check my facebook and to simply breathe..... Same thing with your thumbs... Try , just once, functioning without using your thumbs.. not easy.. I feel for those without thumbs ( Really I do!!).

Speaking of Facebook, why is it that most of us have this unnatural, irresistible urge to check it so often? Most of my FB comments receive several responses so I find it amusing to see what they say and I like to read people's statuses. However, there really is no need to check it every half hour.. FB is a terrible addition........ terrible.......................... Do I really give a shit that Jack Sprat is in the bathroom?( no pun intended) uh NO!

Birthdays

When I was younger, I looked at most adults as old. Being little, everyone looks old to you, especially if they are over 5 feet tall. Adults didn't get it, they acted weird and they were just old. As I look back now, they were the age I am now. I am not old. It's all a matter of perspective though. To a young child now, I am now my aunts. I am old. I do not look old, I do not feel old. Although every once in awhile. I hear myself saying something that ' my mother would say'. I think everyone finds they do that every once in awhile . I'm sure my mother says the same thing of herself with her mother.

Funny thing is there are certain people that still look at me like I am a child. I own my own home, I take care of myself but I am not married. I have decided that is why. Since when does being married classify you as an adult? I must have missed that chapter of the ' What Determines Adulthood' book! I do, however get carded most places I go. I am usually mistaken for being 24-25. Funny thing about that is that I have been a smoker for about 20 years. That will catch up to me I'm sure. Just over the past few months, I have been noticing grays. This is NOT ok with me. Because I do not feel my age or look it, I believe the grays need to wait a few more years. I 'm not old. I'm just maturing. Each year ' old' is a new age. To me, old is 95 :)

The Man in the Mirror

Michael Jackson is dead. It's been 2 weeks but it still blows my mind. I was listening to the radio about 2 days after he died and they were talking about the first child that claimed he was molested by Michael. They said he issued a statement that said it never happened and that his father made him lie. I was listening to it for about 7 or 8 minutes on my way to work. That was the first and last I heard of it.

I don't understand, if this is true why hasn't a big ta-do been made of it? To me, the obvious thing would be to clear the poor man's name. Everyone has their opinions, personally, I don't believe he did it. AND I am all about the kids and protecting them and non tolerance for anything of that nature. However, I never believed he did it. And after hearing that, I was reassured. But then I never heard another word about it.

Am I missing something?

O Captain My Captain

I was on a boat for the first time in a long time recently and I want a boat. When I am rich , I am getting a boat. Some people aren't fond of the water but I am . It does not scare me at all. I loveeeeeeeee the feel of floating on the water, the sound of the water beneath you. I have no clue how to operate a boat or pilot a boat but I want one. I want a boat. Do you get the point?

Annoying drivers

This one is for you Mom.

My mother and I had a conversation last week about annoying drivers. WHY is it that when someone is waiting to pull out to make a left hand turn, they pull out right in front you and you are forced to slow down when in fact there are absolutely NO cars behind you. Why can't they wait 10 more seconds and pull out when there is NO traffic?

Why do people honk at you when you are in a turning lane to make a left hand turn and cars are passing by? PEOPLE you may be in a hurry however, if there are cars passing by , we can NOT turn until the cars are gone.... there's a word for this and it is called yield. Look it up. When the road is clear we will in fact turn. cars are not designed to fly over other cars therefore take it easy lay off the horn and wait.

While I am at it, here's another annoyance. I went into Rite Aid the other day and went up to the counter. The cashier was on my side of the counter organizing the chapstick. I'm assuming she was occupying herself out of boredom because they were all just in a box on the counter. There was about 20 chapsticks sitting on the counter and she was putting them back in the box she took them out of. ONE BY ONE she was picking up the chapstick to put them back. She was standing RIGHT NEXT TO ME so she knew I was waiting and just continued to pick up chapsticks one by one to return them to the box that they were originally in. WHY am I waiting here for you to do this? If you are THAT bored those chapsticks will be there as soon as I leave being as I am the ONLY one in the store. I'm a patient person but I find this annoying and it seems to happen often. They see you standing there and just go about their business and then casually stroll over.

And let's not even get into the grocery store. Ok I will. It never ever fails. I find the line that appears to be the shorest line. Little do I know , no one is in this line because the customer at the front has been there for 30 minutes and having issues. Their credit card won't go through, an item is damaged, they are having items removed one by one until they have enough funds to pay for what they bought or they are having a conversation about their entire life with cashier..

Happens every time........ so why do I still get annoyed by it?

All for a good cause

SO last year my sister, who had a brief scare with MS, signed up for the City to Shore MS Bike Ride. The ride goes from Cherry Hill, NJ to Ocean City's boardwalk. They state the ride is 75 miles. It is really 77.2 ( yes those 2 miles make a difference after being on a bike for 75 miles). You have the option to do the 75 miles down and stop or to ride another 75 miles back the following day. I decided to join her in her journey. We opted for the 75 miles only ride. I hadn't been on a bike in probably at least 20 years when I made the quick decision to ride.

It was a long journey of training and hard work. The first time I got on my bike I rode a mile and just knew I was going to die right then and there. I didn't. After a few weeks I was up to 10 miles with no problem, eventually going 30-40 miles like it was my JOB! No problem, The race went very well , we completed it, we felt GREAT. Our family met us at the finish line to show their support which was just wonderful. There was DJ and we were dancing around and felt on top of the world.

Then we went home ( to our aunt's place in OC). Every body part shut down, even ones that I didn't know had a function, stopped working. My body was reaping the 'rewards' of our hard work.

This year we are back at it ( I think I left my crotch there last year I need to go retrieve it) and this time with a team of 16 people and growing!!! I'm very excited about this as it is all for a great cause to help find a cure and to provide aid to those in our immediate area living with MS.

I have only been on my bike 2 or 3 times so far. I went for a ride tonight, a good ride but a ride that reminded me that I need to keep up with the training on a consistent basis because right now my ass feels like it is going to fall off..... not that that's a bad thing cause I could lose some of the ass.. but I need to step it up! And I will... all for the cause!

Susan Boyled over!

We all know who Susan Boyle is. She has an amazing talent. There has been much ado made of her 'makeover', her singing, her fame and now her 'breakdown'.

In my opinion, it wasn't a 'makeover'. If I was on a reality show, I would certainly get a haircut, tweeze the eyebrows and put on some makeup. Why this was a big deal I have no idea. Those who watch American Idol know that the contestants transform from the start of the show until the end ( can anyone say Clay Aiken?). Anyone would do the same. You are on TV you want to look your best.

Her 'breakdown'? I don't know. If I went from nobody to somebody everyone was watching overnight and was hounded by the media and pressured all over the world to win a reality show, I may have a 'breakdown' myself. Too much too fast. The poor woman probably wants a week to get her wits about her so that she can move on and start the rest of her life. I hope she's sitting on a lounge chair with a margarita in hand relaxing. She's entitled to it!

The Afterlife

I am very curious about what happens to us after we die. Being a Catholic, I believe that we go to Heaven. BUT what does that mean exactly? Is it a place way above the sky where our souls all congregate and rest peacefully and eternally? Is it just a 'thought' and we really don't see anything at all? My mother's version has slots machines in Heaven. I like that theory!

What about ghosts? Some may think I am nuts but I do believe that ghosts exist. But why and how? Are they just lost souls? Do they have unresolved issues that they need to deal with before 'crossing over'? Are some just there to assure the ones they left behind that they are at peace? There are so many different theories behind it. The truth of the matter is no one knows. At least not until we reach that point.

What is your idea of Heaven?

Life is Precious

Life is precious. Life is good. Life is also cut short sometimes.

Alot of people come and go from our lives. Even if they go they can make a big impression on you. Never forget to let those who have shared in your life and have touched it in some way know that they have done so.

You never know when it's going to be too late.

Neighbors

I love my neighborhood. It's quiet and peaceful. I have a neighbor who is older and has been a God Send to me. He has done more for me that I could wish for. However, when is it crossing the line between being helpful and being pushy?

My home and my lawn are very well cared for. I personally think I have one of the nicest lawns on the block. I know what needs to be done and I do it. Weather and time permitting.. but it always gets done and done timely. Maybe because I am a girl or maybe because I am not 70 years old, some neighbors think that I need to be told how and when to do things ( even before they need to be done)..

I bite my tongue MOST of the time, as I try to respect my elders and I appreciate the concern on my behalf. But some of the time, I would much rather just tell them to shut the hell up!

I feel better now...

Guilty Pleasures

I will be the first to admit I am a total American Idol junkie.

The first time I watched I lived at home with my mother. It was the first season ( 8 years ago). She came home from wherever she was and came into my room and told me to turn on this show called American Idol and that her boss's son was on it. I was really into the show I was already watching but reluctantly turned it on. We watched for about 20 minutes before we saw a quick glimpse of this 'dude's' head. That was it. Back then the first few episodes didn't focus as much on the individual contestants. I decided this was a stupid show and that it was the first and last time I was watching it. But the following week, I turned it on again and found it just a little more interesting. As the weeks passed, I had some communications via email with my mother and this 'dude's stepfather (moms' boss) telling us what was up on the next episode and to vote and spread the word of the show. Next thing you know, AI is the talk of the country and everyone is tuning in. 'Dude' aka Justin Guarini was the first season's runner up.

I have been hooked ever since. It's one of my guilty pleasures. A pleasure that has completely dorkified me. I will not watch it with other people. I tried that once with the first season's finale in a room filled with my family. My brother in law (who is generally more on the quiet reserved side) would NOT SHUT UP the entire show. I could not hear. I was not happy. Hence my vow to watch AI alone.

I find it fascinating to watch how every single year, they allllll start out the first few weeks with awful song choices. WHY? Dude , you are on American Idol trying to make a start of your career and you are seriously singing Easy like Sunday Morning?! Hello? Don't get me wrong , it's a good song to listen to in the confines of your home and sing to with a hairbrush, but AI?

But their progress during the season is exemplary and I get so proud of my little AI hopefuls. Thankfully, there is TIVO now so if I am in the presence of others, I find it unneccessary to get irritated, I simply don't pay attention to the show and can go home to watch it in peace.

And now I must go prepare myself for tonight's results show! Will it be Danny and Adam? I'm about to go find out.................................

Judging a book by it's cover...

Last week at work, I mentioned that I needed to get a new book to read. A friend of mine took a book out of her drawer and said that she had this book forever and thought it looked boring and had no intention of reading it and offered it to me.

I read that book in about 3 days. It was mesmerizing and probably one of the best books I have read to date.

I pride myself in being not 'judging books by their covers'. Everyone always gets a second chance, and with me usually a third ,fourth of fifth until I know it's time to draw the line. But I truly beleive that actions and words are not always stated as intended. I know this because I have been there on both ends and I don't like to be judged. I beleive that everyone has their issues and that there is good in everyone ( and I believe that in people that I probably shouldn' t as well).

My friends know me as someone to come to. Everyone needs someone come to. Whether you are right, wrong, in trouble or having a bad day. Everyone needs to express themselves and no one is perfect. I do this because I have been judged so many times in my life and it's not a good feeling. I do this because I believe that maybe if I do it , someone else will pay it forward.

My intentions are always good... always.. and I truly believe that anyone who has been judged feels the same. At least I hope so....

You miss out alot when you judge. I wouldn't have the friends that I have if I would have judged them as I could have on day one. And I thank God that I did not because everyone deserves that chance.

Happy Mother's Day!

I am not a mother ( although I have been called one a few times ). I do have two nephews and a niece. I couldn't imagine loving someone more that I love them. But I know that it doesn't compare to the love a mother has for a child.

I see my sisters with their kids and I see the look in their eyes when they do something funny or sweet. It's a look that's indescribable. We've all seen it. It's a look that could never be matched by anything else.

While I am not a mother, I have been blessed to have the best mother in the world. While, we can get on each others nerves at times, I would be lost without her. She's my guide, my friend and my angel. She knows how much I love her. So while I don't know the feeling of loving a child of my own, I am fortunate to know the feeling of being a child that loves her mother just as much back.

I wish everyone a Happy's Mother's Day. In my opinion , every day is Mother's Day!

Embarrasing Moments- Part 2

As promised Lynn.

Several years ago, my boyfriend at the time, we will call him Bob, because that's his name, and I went to Hershey Park for the 4th of July. We stayed at the Hershey Hotel , which was beautiful , and spent the weekend there.

Saturday afternoon, we went to Hershey's Garden. It was full of vibrant flowers and trees and had an incredible Butterfly house that my mother would adore. After walking around the garden we went to the gift shop. We parted ways and were looking around. I stopped at one of those revolving racks that you spin around. It contained postcards. I picked up a few and proceeded on my quest for items I had absolutely no use for.

A few minutes later, I feel something snag on my jacket ( it was July but it was damp and I am always cold). I turned my head just a little and saw the revolving rack I was just at a few minutes before. I stopped dead in my tracks. I could feel it moving so I reached back and grabbed it with my hand. The moving stopped. I am standing there, completely still with my hand on the 'rack' knowing that if I made the slightest move that thing was going down.

Bob comes over looks at me and says ' WHAT ARE YOU DOING'? I laughed, and said "Help it's going to fall over if I move- unsnag me." He looks , laughs, shakes his head and says ' Erica look behind you and let go'. I turn around and I am not holding onto the rack, I am holding onto a small child( one who never said a word). He must have thought I was his mother and came up and tugged on my jacket and I just grabbed ( obviously unaware of what the hell I was doing.)

His mother comes up at that point and looks at me ( we are pretty much pissing ourselves and my face was a ridiculous shade of red). I simply say "I'm so sorry I thought he was a rack" , dropped my stuff and out the door we went.

Can you say Jackass?

Embarrassing Moments

We've all had them. Me- I've had enough to run a year long marathon on America's Funniest Home Videos-but here is one of my favorites...

It was the summer of 1993 ( I think). A few friends and I decided to go to Pizza Hut for lunch. Now this was back in the day when Pizza Hut had a kick ass buffet and restaurant, not just delivery.

We ate, talked, had a great time. We get the bill, I put my money on the table and I told my friends I would be right back, I had to pee. Now, if I were to design a restaurant, my choice of placement for a restroom would NOT be smack dab in the front of the restuarant.. obviously I did not design this particualr restaurant (which was just one big room with tables and the bufet in the middle). So I go to the front of restaurant and enter the bathroom. Sink is immediately on my left and toilet is about 6 feet from the sink.

Being as it is 1993, I am dressed in my gnarly mid shirt and shorts. I put my 'just in case I slip and hit the seat' toilet paper on the seat, pull down my shorts and squat. As I begin to do my business, I notice that I neglected to lock the door to this single bathroom. I instantly squeeze and halt all further bodily releases. I inch my way ( carefully so that my shorts, which are at my knees don't hit the floor) towards the door. Now mind you, everything from mid stomach to knees is without cover. I get close enough to the door to reach over to lock it. Just as my fingers touch the knob the door opens -WIDE! I look up to a happy little couple needing to use the bathroom. I shriek (quite loudly). These two poor innocent full bladdered people ( who hopefully already ate) see me squatting over by the door, nowhere near the toilet with my pants down! They looked at me like I was INSANE! Then I look past them...... there we have a restuarant full of people looking up to see what the shreiking it about and I'm there at the door with my pants down....

I slammed the door shut ( again making as much noise as one can possibly make while going to the bathroom) and just stayed in there for about 10 minutes wondering how to make my exit. Finally I decided that I can not stay in Pizza Hut forever , opened the bathroom door and ran out the front door. Then I proceed to knock on the window to let me friends that I was out there and was NOT coming back in.... Humiliating....

Pizza Hut 'restuarants' around here are now closed. GEE I wonder why.........................

Ravioli Night is heaven!

I am fortunate to come from a close family. My mother's side is 100% Italian (insert greasy, hairy jokes here). We try to get together often. With there being so many of us, it's not always easy to do. But there is one day a year that we are always together. Ravioli night.

Ravioli night is on Fat Tuesday each and every single year. It's the one day of the year that we all look forward to. My grandmother and all her 'cooking assistants' spend two days preparing the feast.

We eat Homemade Raviolis (which are to die for). We eat too much, we drink too much wine and we talk too loudly.

Every year I silently look around and observe each and every one there. Every year I am amazed. Amazed by how many of us there are, amazed that one house can be filled with so much love and laughter. Amazed to hear what may have happened in someone's life that I haven't yet heard. Amazed to see how much the kids have grown. Amazed that I may not have seen someone for months and we bond like we were together yesterday.

But the one I watch the most is my grandmother. She sits and watches and takes it all in. She has created this day, these lives and this joy. Every day, I am amazed by her. And I know that my grandfather is looking down on us from heaven and is amazed too.

To most, a crowded house full of loud talking, wine drinking Italians would be enough to make someone want to jump out of a window. To me, it's heaven.

OCD

I think most people have a touch of OCD. Me, I have several 'touches ' of it, so I am told. However, what really justifies it as being OCD? My biggest OCD issue is brushing my teeth. I do it often. My teeth aren't perfectly white nor are they even perfectly straight and pretty. They are just teeth. You see all these people walking around with these pearly white perfect teeth and when you ask them how they got that way, they claim not to do anything and that they are just like that. These people suck!

I brush my teeth several times a day. Why? Because I do. We all have had moments of talking to someone close up who is breathing all over you and you feel like you are going to pass out from their breath. Mind you these people have no business being THAT close to you to begin with. However, I don't want to be one of those people. When you smoke, you stink. I know this. Therefore, to me , brushing my teeth helps to lessen the blow. I do not want to be the girl that everyone calls Ass Breath...therefore I brush often. I prefer to call it Dental Hygiene, not OCD.

What do your OCD issues consist of?

The Roller Coaster

Life is a roller coaster. We start out too small to be able to get on the ride. As we start to grow, we experience the innocent youthful thrill of being able to get on the ride, accompanied by our parents, with the contentment that someone is there to hold our hand until the ride is over and keep us safe. As adults, the ride gets scarier, lasts longer and those that were holding our hand years ago, now simply hold our heart as they watch us from the ground as we ride .

We all have a choice, we can either sit the ride out or buy a ticket. I chose to buy the ticket. I hope you all will come along for the ride with me!

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